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Marriage Advice

by Jon (follow)
Anonymous (130)     
Rating: 5/5

Marriage Advice

Hi Members,
I am facing issues in my married life and looking for support.
Long story alert!!
I know my husband for 13yrs and we are married for 8yrs. We have two kids one 4 yr and other 2yr.
We both are professionals and migrated to Australia 6 yrs ago.Both have secure jobs and earn relatively well.
All these years I have been adjusting and comprising with his behaviour.But somewhere i lost myself.
He is a very laid back and lazy person.He doesn't care about his health.He doesn't have personal or professional goals.He just does his 9-5 job and watches TV for the rest of the day.
He doesn't go out much and network.
I feel very demotivated looking at him.

He doesn't help me with household chores.If I keep asking him he will do it half heartedly..leaving the work unfinished.This behaviour really irks me.
But I can't show this frustration on him.He will shout at me like a mad bull..many a time physically hitting me and abusing me with bad words.
If I just control all my feelings, just shower him with lot of praise, do my work and get money, take care of him , take care of household chores, take care of the kids then he will be nice to me.
If I try to discuss about his behaviour he will become all violent.He physically abused me in front of kids.They were alarmed and stared crying.
I don't want to raise my kids in such unhealthy environment.
Divorce is not an option.In our community divorce is still a taboo.I too don't want kids to suffer because of our seperation.
But the thought of me compromising and supressing my feelings for the rest of my life is killing me.
I am not as confident as I used to be.I don't have enough time to grow professionally among all these chores and worries.
My health took a toll.i have increased 20kilos.
Any suggestions how I can overcome this.
Is there any counselling where I can get solutions for my problems, so that we can lead happy marriage.

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