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Anger issues

by JAJ (follow)
Anonymous (73)     
Rating: 5/5

Anger issues


Sorry for the long post, but just looking for some advice or ideas on how to make things better.
So, issues are with my partner, we have a one year old little boy. He works fifo, 2 and 2. He has anger issues, not like, serious anger issues.. he can't deal with our little boy without getting shitty. He'll feed him and our bub will whinge and try turn around in the high chair and he'll put him back down and kind of get tougher and just stay stop over and over again getting angrier and angrier. And then he'll grab him out of the high chair roughly and throw the bowl in the sink. He gets shitty if I come over and try help. He gets annoyed thinking I run over every time our bub cry's but it's more I come over cos I can hear him getting shitty. He won't talk to our bub to try make it fun, unless he's in an absolutely brilliant mood. He won't help me with anything unless I ask. He won't help around the house unless I get sick of it and crack the shits with him. He won't change his nappy unless I ask, or get him out of his cot or give him a bottle. I feel like I do everything, as well as working part time now. I feel like I'm alone, even when he's home. I've tried talking to him about it and he can see the problems but, he's not exactly at the point that he's trying to fix it I feel. I feel like his mates thoughts and opinions on him are more important than his own family, meaning me and bub. He's come from a fkd family and background and says he doesn't want to be like his dad, but.. I feel like that's what he is turning into.
I understand working away is hard, but I don't get the feeling like he misses us, I feel like he'd rather drink at the pub with his mates than talk to us. I'm seeing a councillor and on antidepressants and, the process of me trying to better myself was done solely by myself. I feel like I had no help and support from him at all. He didn't try to make my life easier, in fact I feel like he made it harder. I love him and I feel like I'm making excuses for him in my head, but at the same time I'm sick of the sht and I'm over debating with myself if I should just do everything myself and not try to involve him in helping out with our bub. Even though I'm worn out and it would be nice just to have 5 minutes of someone else doing something. I don't know how to feel. He'll start to make an effort and it will be great, like I'm happy, we're all happy, I think. But then I feel like our normal is now him being in a shitty mood and not doing anything to support us except work away. And even still, it's not like I'm not doing anything to conntribute to our money pool. I just would like some advice. He's said that he thinks he needs to see someone, and we got a referral from the dr to see a councillor but he hasn't done anything about it since. I've tried to tell him that I think he needs it and it would really help him. But he still won't do anything about it even though he's agreed he will make an appointment. Anyways, thoughts and opinions welcome thank you.

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